The Kind of Friend I'd Like To Be

In college, I had a friend named Shea.  She wasn't like most of my friends.  We met while we were both youth leaders at a local church:  she being one of the best, I being one of the worst.  I was leading a double-life:  immersed in sorority sub-culture at one end of the spectrum, trying to be a spirtual mentor on the other.  Honestly, I needed to be IN a youth group, not leading it.  I think God knew that when he gave me Shea as a friend.

Shea wasn't in a sorority.  When I first met her, she was in charge of a girls' dorm hall.  When we graduated from college, she was employed as a bus driver for the University of Georgia.  In other words, she did jobs that other girls were terrified of.  Naturally, this made her one of my coolest friends.

I am ashamed to say that I don't know as much about Shea as I wish I did.  At that stage of my life, it was all about me. The really amazing thing is: even though I can see in hindsight that I was a lousy friend, Shea  never made me feel guilty or even aware of my inadequacies.  She didn't keep score and somehow found ways to bless me again and again, despite my selfishness.

It seemed like the entire time I knew Shea, I was going through one low spot or another.  During those times, Shea was the friend that asked me to spend the night with her in her dorm room when it was obvious that I needed a break from whatever early-20s drama I was involved in.  She introduced me to great movies like "Ever After."  She prayed for me.  She bought me raspberry sorbet at my apartment to cheer me up.  I don't even like raspberry sorbet, but I still love eating it some days because it reminds me of her and her generous acts of kindness.

After college, we lost touch.  When I was getting married 3 years later, she was on the top of my list to be a bridesmaid.  The problem was: I had no idea how to find her at the time.  That was probably God's way of looking out for her --- who needs another bridesmaid's dress?  The point is: when I looked at all the people I'd ever known - she was one of the ones who had exerted the most profound influence on my life.

Now - a decade after college, that still hasn't changed.  In my life, I haven't known many people who are as selfless, as giving, and as completely awesome.  She was an undeserved blessing in my life, and I am still thankful for her to this day.